I’m just sitting here thinking today…I guess kind of reflecting over my life maybe. And I remembered a dream I had some weeks ago, maybe a month now. Over a month even, now that I’ve made such a big move.
The dream itself was kind of shocking. In short, I dreamt that someone was about to push me off a cliff and when I woke up, what I heard was “sometimes, God will push you into your blessings”…
At the time, I was just like ehhhmmmm…. what?
But now, just sitting here reflecting over it and just kind of noticing a pattern here. And the pattern is…
When God is bringing you into your next chapter, He removes His peace from your current chapter.
And the LORD, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed.Deutoronomy 31:8
One clear thing I’ve noticed in my life overall is that when God is trying to usher change in my life, the period before it gets pretty hectic.
And the only reason the chaos lasts for so long is because I can be stubborn lol wanting to stick to the things I’m familiar with instead of branching out into the unknown. I feel like the more I did it, obviously, the less resistance I put up. But yeah.
And when I say chaotic I mean chaotic. Just everything frustrates you. Whether it was a location getting too cramped and crowded, suddenly money and finances were a problem, people just obnoxiously rude, my daily routine seemed which used to flow wonderfully now seems like a clogged pipe trying to breathe lol. Things that at one point used to be so simple were just suddenly spinning out of control.
Those little frustrations that make you think “man, if I could just get control over this thing, EVERYTHING can fall back into place!” But… you never end up getting control over that one thing.
I guess the way I view it now is that when God is removing His peace from your current chapter, in a way, you’re opening a door now for the enemy to come in and torment you and rob you of your joy because now, in a way, you are being disobedient to God and not moving in His Will.
I never viewed it that way before but I guess now it just kinda… hit me. Lol thank you Holy Spirit! Lol
At this moment, I have given up quite a bit of “comfort” in exchange for what I presume a lot of people may view as “hardships”.
But ironically, it is in these perceived hardships that I have absolutely been having the most joy! If I’m being honest, I could say I’ve pretty much left everything behind in order to pursue God’s will and I have so much more joy, peace, love and kindness in my heart.
There’s a lot less I’m stressing over now and my basic needs are being cared for.
For the first time in my life, I feel I truly understood the meaning of this scripture:
19 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: 20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: 21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.Matthew 6: 19-21
When I read this scripture over, I contemplated what Treasures in Heaven really meant. And then I understood!
Ultimately, here on Earth, we are all seeking the same gifts. Happiness. Peace. Love. Community. Good health. Etc. Those are the ultimate gifts we all seek, though we may try to find them in different ways.
Whether that be through shopping, relationships, games, food, traveling, education, or whatever, ultimately we are looking to attain the same gifts.
The problem is, if we only look to store them on earth, imperfect men easily corrupts them. Deceptive personalities can corrupt our longing for the gift of Love. Mean spirited individuals and imperfect situations can frustrate our longing for the gift of Peace. Tainted foods and illnesses corrupt our desires for the gift of Perfect Health.
But as long as we store our treasures (put our faith) in Heaven, those gifts are incorruptible. There is perfect happiness, joy, peace, health, etc.
Peace may not come in the package you feel like it should. Yes, at one point I felt at peace in my old home. But it became obvious that I outgrew the lesson I needed to learn there and God was removing His peace because He wanted to usher me into my next chapter.
As scary and frightening as it was to make all the decisions I did, I ultimately wanted to follow Him… because He was clearly holding the Peace I longed for! 🤣
I dunno, I was just thinking. I mean, I’ve been on this situation before, and that was truly a peace-less situation lol. To be here again and be in a completely different, and more positive mindset, speaks a lot to me about the personal changes I’ve undergone. Have they been easy?
But it’s been worth it! I can tell you THAT much. I have lacked nothing, though it’s not everything I want, I have everything I need. And honestly, the best part in all of this is strengthening my relationship with Jesus! I can definitely see the changes in my faith for the better and if nothing else, the change was worth it for just that benefit!
So what now, huh? What next!?
Honestly, I don’t know. I’m just sitting here chilling with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich about to go to bed. Sweet dreams my wonderful peeps! May the Lord be with you.
Love you. Mean it!